Somethings got to give...

Can't seem to get where I want to be...

I have tried write on several occasions but I seem to only be able to find 'vent worthy' content coming out of me. I didn't want this blog to be a place to spew negative thoughts and frustrations but I'm not writing anything - that says a lot to me.

Not to say I haven't had a lot of positive in my life because I have. But underlying is my deep frustration to not be able to achieve what I thought would be a fairly easy goal. Lose 13 lbs! I started my running program 8 weeks ago and with that I started to add more control to my diet. With no results after a few weeks, 3 weeks ago I decided I needed to seriously 'hyper focus' on my intake. It's all I've got left, I work out (ride 3 days, run 3 days) 6 days a week. Geez, don't I deserve one day to chill? Even though I think I'm not as mentally well on my off day. And typically feel like a slug for the day but I do sit in front of a computer all day working. I validate Tuesdays as my 'off' workout day because I teach ballet for 2 hours on Tuesday evenings. It's not like I'm sitting on the couch eating bon-bons. Ick.

So, here I sit 8 weeks into my running program, I'm running my first 5K this coming Sunday - I was hoping to be several pounds lighter for it but miracles apparently aren't happening.

I'm not sure what I'm going to do at this point. I am not thrilled with feeling hungry for the better part of my day everyday. Perhaps, I should just completely change up my exercise regimen. Not sure what I can do there either, I'm trying to run as fast as I can and when I ride I'm riding as fast as I can. Chew on that for a while...

For now, I guess I'll just keep plugging away at it. For today, I'm apparently tired, (long weekend) have a lot of 'stuff' on my mind and I'm hungry (not yet lunch time) :-|

I have 3 weeks until my first century ride and I WILL be lighter for that. I wanted to be closer to 13 lbs lighter (funny - my bike weighs 15.3 lbs.) So I guess you could say I'm trying to lose my bike in weight. Maybe that is just the mind game I need to get this done. Who knows what will do it - that I've learned through the years.

The other tactic I'm instilling in my daily efforts is I'm getting on the dreaded scale everyday and not just once a week. A friend of mine does it and says it works. From my early days of dancing in a Company I've been very anti-scale and pride myself on having the courage to get on it once a week, but by the end of the week it's too late when you see damage has been done.

Somethings got to give...